August 13, 2011
The following post is a blatant in-your-face-make-no-apologies-take-no-prisoners promotional advertisement for Sweetie Bites. Buy them. Buy them now.
In the spirit of “How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?” another question now plagues the minds of people throughout the land, the question of “How many bites does it take to eat a Sweetie Bite?”
It depends. If you eat like a wolverine, 1 bite. If you eat like a human with even a modicum of manners, 2 bites. If you’re trying to make one of these little gems of a treasure last as long as possible, 26 bites.
No matter how many bites it takes to eat a Sweetie Bite, every bite’s just as fresh, hand-crafted, and deeeeelicious as any Sweet Hope Cookie. And I’m pushing them because I love to make them. Making Sweetie Bites is cookie play for me. Sweetie Bites are little palettes for trying out new colors and busting out all my cookie bling; the sprinkles, non-pareils, jimmies, luster dust, disco dust, candy clay and just about anything glimmers, sparkles or shines.
I have a bin full of mini cookie cutters for every holiday and special occasion. Sweetie Bites make great gifts when given in a decorative glass jar or bowl or tied up with a ribbon in the clear plastic box I deliver them in. Sweetie Bites are 6.00 a dozen with a minimum order of 4 dozen (unless they’re part of a larger order), and I’ll let you in on a secret as long as you promise not to say anything. Promise? Okay then. You always get extras with Sweetie Bites. A dozen Sweetie Bites might be 14 or 16 or even 20. I’m just saying. And remember you aren’t actually buying cookies but rather, in giving a donation to The ALS Association I in turn give you cookies as a way to say thank you. Okay. Fine. Whatever. You say tomato, I say tomahto.
So over the past few weeks I had a couple orders for Sweetie Bites. One was for flowers. Specifically flowers with pearls, as in candy pearls not oyster pearls, which I only delineate between in consideration of the non-cookie decorating individuals among us. I threw in the leaves as a bonus for no other reason than a flower without leaves is like…..is like…..a sweater without sleeves, except that a sweater without sleeves would be a knitted vest so forget that I just said that.
Here’s an order with Teeny Weeny Bites double-deckered on top of Sweetie Bites. Teeny Weeny Bites are not sold separately in Canada, Puerto Rico, or any where else for that matter. And before you ask how many bites are in a Teeny Weeny Bite, they’re so teeny and weeny that consumption of them is measured in nibbles, hence a Teeny Weeny Bite equals three niblets. Ten niblets equal one nibble.
Even though I’m nearly certain no one is still reading this post I’m going to continue on like I’m a freakin’ cookie blog rockstar anyway, and yes, I have a rich and full fantasy life. Thank you for asking.
The other Sweetie Bite order I did was for my brother-in-law’s girlfriend Shiho. The woman has a thing for owls so owls it was. Only a couple weeks ago Pam over at CookieCrazie made a starfish cookie that she added texture to by allowing the top surface of the sweet glaze to dry just a little before adding indentations, and so being the CookieCrazie Copycat that I am I tried her technique on the owl wings. It worked. Happy face.
Showing you the owl cookies isn’t nearly as good as showing you what happened when Shiho took the Sweetie Bites into her office to share with her co-workers.
Just how much did that make my day!
Anyway, because I had so much fun with these recent orders of Sweetie Bites I had a little idea I like to call . . .
. . . suspenseful pause . . .
. . .Taaaa-Daaaah . . . Cookie Corn!
Seriously. How fun is that?!? You know you love it. You know you want it. In fact, let me go out on a limb and suggest that you need it. For a 14 dollar donation to the ALS Association you get 12 small cookies, 12 Sweetie Bites and 6 Teeny Weeny Bites in a cardboard popcorn box in either vanilla bean-almond, chocolate, or lemon flavored. If my math is correct (though it never is) a box of Cookie Corn comes out to 62.4 bites more or less. Unless you’re a wolverine that is. For an added 2 dollar donation I’ll add a message on the cookies (limit 24 letters) which would make for a mighty tasty puzzle message to give as a gift. You can buy just one box of Candy Corn but knowing you like I do, seeing that we go way back and all, I’d recommend that you order at least two boxes. One for you and and the other one for you.